Saturday, August 22, 2009

Dear Universe,

I am starting to see a trend, Universe. You seem to like dumping crap on me, my family and my friends. I was just wondering if you plan on being done any time soon. It is getting really old and I think your energy could be of better use.

Here is a list for you review of things that need to stop.

1. No more crazy bills that pop out of nowhere. You keep sending them to people I know, they are for sure showing up at my house. Can you forward them out into the void in future?

2. I don't want to be sick at the same time as my kid, and neither do other Moms. Can you work on some sort of rule where parents and kids can't be sick at the same time?

3. We decline any further car problems. I don't want throw up in my car, and I don't want any engines shutting down or exploding anymore. Please.

4. Stop stealing cash from my wallet when I am not looking. I don't know where you are putting it. I know this happens to all of us so can you fix that glitch too?

5. Send my husband home. I am over single parenting. And for those how can't get out of single parenting, please send them a large dose of help.

6. Laundry. Just make it stop.

Well Universe, I would really like you to fix these things as soon as possible. I know we would all be a lot happier.

Oh, and can you please start freezing time when I, and my friends, want to blog so that kids will stop screaming long enough for us to type about how wonderful they are? It would be nice if chores also did themselves during blog time.

I will let you know when the crazy unexpected bills stop popping into my mail box.

Thanks.

-Rach

2 people had this to say...:

Cathleen said...

Hey Rachel! Hang in there! :) The universe seemed to do all those crazy things to me when my kids were little too....
seems like a trend that has been around for a long, long time.
Love you!

Jennica said...

Lol! I laughed so hard. Loved the bit about blogging.