Thursday, June 12, 2008

I am so hot!

Angelina Jolie is always being qouted about how wonderful and sexy pregnacy is. She is right.

Pregnancy is super sexy. Every time I think I have reached new heights of pregnancy hotness I always am surprised with something more.

Some things that make pregnancy hot:

1.Throw up.
What is better or hotter than a woman who barfs uncontrollably? What man doesn't want to see a woman's meal twice?

2. Incontinence.
Some people like a woman who pees her pants. Wasn't it Adam Sandler who said, "Your not cool unless you pee your pants?"

Men like to see a woman all hot and bothered right?

What man doesn't like to see a woman in thigh highs? White medical thigh highs that make a woman's legs look like those of the Stay Puft Marshmellow Man. Guys love marshmallows. Plus if you are LDS, the marshmallow look is even more complete with the super sexy underwear.

5.Stretch Marks.
Never stop for directions again, just use the map on your wife's hips! Men love this. They can't get enough of not having to ask for directions. Need to get to the next city? Check out my left thigh. The short cuts are marked in deep purple.

6.Getting out of bed.
What man doesn't like to feel strong and powerful. And what better way to feel that than tugging your nearly two hundred pound bloated woman in and out of beds, chairs and cars! Makes a man feel strong!

Maybe her thoughts on the beauty of pregnancy have something to do with the fact that she has millions of dollars, and beautiful big house, no worries, several nannies, a personal trainer, personal chef, a post C-Section tummy tuck and lipo, not to mention Brad Pitt.

Nah, I think its the stretch marks.

1 people had this to say...:

Anonymous said...

I'm hot too, but I think you call it menopause!