Monday, February 25, 2008

19 weeks and I feel like an Airport!

You know you are getting into the nity gity of pregnancy when you start to feel like an international airport.

I have a dark line down the middle of my belly now. I showed it to John and he said it looks like a landing strip.

Landing strip?


Does this man value his life?

He is right. It does look like a landing strip.

Then I noticed I am also developing practically neon signs that say "Food court here."
All I need now if for a little man in orange to jump out of my shallow belly button, slap a couple air traffic lights on my expanding butt and start directing traffic with mini orange flags. There are plenty of people to direct too. Nurses, Doctors, Ultasound techs, and their numbers are only going to climb.

Another new development in the world of pregnancy is that I am no longer allowed to wear hi-heels to work. That's right. Husband has chucked them all out after I popped the straps off a pair on Friday. My feet were so swollen that My little Mary Jane's literally burst their buttons.

I have what I have been dreading the most. Cankles. Those are ankles the same thickness as your calf.

They were so puffy that I couldn't stand up straight because the tops of my feet were crushing against the front of my shins.

John had to rub the puffiness out for a full hour before the sausages at the bottom of my legs started to resemble ankles and feet again.

I had to buy new flats for work, and then spent an hour re-hemming all of my pants for flats.

I am a big fan of heels. I think they thin me out. Give me a little height. I have all of my work slacks hemmed for 5 inch heels. It was so sad to cut five full inches of fabric off them all. I could have made a freaking quilt with all the fabric.

Now I will not only have to be a round pregnant woman, but a short and stumpy one too.

By the way, baby is the size of a Grapefruit and my uterus is the size of a Cantaloupe. We will find out tomorrow what this baby is.....
Now I am going to go eat some fruit. All of analogies are making me hungry.

1 people had this to say...:

Anonymous said...

Okay, so you get a trash can, and put it upside down under your desk so you can put your feet up while you are at your desk. Did this when pregnant with both you and Meg. Works well. Everyone will offer you their trash can!!